curious-me's Diaryland Diary

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Ramble on baby....

The sun is hiding behind tons of cloud cover. It's a blah day. I almost walked out of the house today wearing bright orange pants (don't worry they're not as tacky as they sound) but at the last minute I switched to dark green. I just wasn't in the mood for bright and cheery. Yup dark green matches my mood to a T.

Well I surprised myself. After patting myself on the back so much over my whole attitude with the break up lately I nearly cried today! I know it was crazy. A couple of co-workers asked me something to do with the ex and I told them we're no longer together. One of them said "you guys were joined at the lips". Yah thanks...I know...I was there. I mean this was from a person who is a co-worker only, no signs of friendship etc. When other people are surprised that we broke up cause we looked so close, it makes me feel a bit better that our break up was a shock. We were close up the weekend we broke up. Warning signs might have been nice. Alllll right moving on. I was laying last night on my bed and thinking "really thinking" if J and I could have made it as a couple...you know forever kind of deal. My first instinct is "yes" but then I 'laid there and thought about our relationship. I, of course, got bored thinking about this deep stuff and moved on to reading a book but so far the consensus was that "no" we couldn't have made it. More on that later when I'm in the mood to discuss it. I'm tired and blah.

I had some friends over for Survivor last night. We kept expecting it to get pre-empted with war talk. It didn't. I was grateful. But then we sat there and watched war talk for the next hour or so. Depressing. I don't have a lot to say about it - in fact I have nothing to say about it right now.

Whew I got wicked breath. I just had a sub with onions and hot peppers on it and a bag of Doritos....not a good combo. Speaking of doritos. Those were just gratuitious, they came with the combo. I was starving so of course I ate them. S just called and is backing out of the gym tonight. She's gonna spend some time with her man. I can understand. Of course I'll be going to the gym and doing two killer classes. I gotta get me a man so I have a reason to duck out of the gym! Among other reasons of course.

Yah so my manager asked me if I still wanted to volunteer for doing back up for a couple of positions in our office. I said yes. And she said it may involve 4 weeks of training in Toronto - yah! I am like the only person who loves going away on company money and staying in a hotel on their dime. Last time I was away it was only for a week and every night I was busy going out to dinner etc. with friends. J and I weren't dating and he begged me to let him come and stay over one night. I let him but made him sleep in the other bed. I was so mean. And only for one night. Hey, we weren't dating. I had other friends to see. Yah so if this training actually happens it will be interesting to see what kind of time I'll have seeing as how I have no boyfriend, no prospects etc. Whew...who's being a negative nancy?

Ironically I have 10 packs of gum at home....not one stick at work. Dang irony. Is it sad that I'm looking forward to scrubbing my tub and surrounding walls in my bathroom this weekend? I think I'm getting Spring Fever. I keep wanting to clean things but I just don't have the time. Would I rather clean my apartment or go to the gym? The gym wins of course. But seeing as how I have absolutely no plans to do anything this weekend and S is going out of town I may actually have the time. That's unless I get freaked out about being home on a weekend and don't call any of my friends. Being alone is not as easy as it sounds.

My contacts are dry. A combination of the dry air in the office and my being tired. I gotta go mail my watch back to Timex. That doesn't really tie in with anything. But then again this entry is pretty rambly. Won't it be exciting when I actually have something to write about? I know I'll be excited. Until then I'll just keep on rambling......

2:01 p.m. - 2003-03-20

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