curious-me's Diaryland Diary

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Men are idiots - plain & simple

I sometimes thnk I'm cursed when it comes to men. Maybe I'm destined not to have a normal functioning relationship. Seriously, sometimes I think that everything is great and Keith and I are doing really good. But then something like what happened last night happens. I went over after work, he fed me some smokin' fajitas and then we went to the movies and saw Matrix 2. Then we were back at his place, just sittin' and talkin' and his phone rings. I could hear plain as day since the other voice on the end was loud. I heard, "Are you busy....if you are just say wrong number". Keith kind of stood there looking puzzled and she repeated the above line and he finally told her that he was busy and she said she the above line again and then she told him she would let him go. You want to talk about fuming. I was pissed. My hands went cold and I moved across the room from him and I tried to talk to him rationaly. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have a history with all this - on both ends. I was the instigator and I was the one who had the ex-lover calling and wanting to see me. I know the tricks from all ends. I was cheesed off. I knew the game she was playing. She happened to be driving by and thought she'd call him at eleven at night when she knows he'd probably be up getting ready for work (except last night was his night off but he would still be up). See? She's up to no good! I think I finally got my point across after an hour of talking about it. He said he would email her that night.

He didn't. He fell asleep. But when he was on line this morning so was she so he apparently had the talk with her then. I think he probably made me out to be a psycho jealous gf - now this is only speculation I could be wrong. But apparently she took it okay and just wanted to call and talk about her boyfriends. Yeah plural. Whatever - we all know it's a jealousy move. She doesn't know who she's dealing with I am all about the cunning ways us women have and how far we'll go to land a guy....been there sister done that. Keith may be naive (very) but I'm wary enough for the both of us. Although I still want to smack him in the head for being so blind to it. And I know he is. He's a very smart guy but when it comes to relationships and the opposite sex he is way out of his league. He looked so desperate last night trying to convince me that he wants me and only me - there is no choice. I told him that actions speak louder than words.

Anyway enough about that - time will tell if my heart is going to be ripped to shreds or not. Forvever the optomist aren't I?

I saw J yesterday. He was downtown getting his hair cut and I was leaving work. We spoke for a little bit. It wasn't to bad. Later on I had this moment of clarity if you will. Everything is working out for the best. J and I could never be. Our lives are in two different directions. Now we're both with people who are on our level. We can both find happiness. I'm not saying we're going to double date anytime soon but it's nice to know that I'm on the road to recovery. The bitterness seems to be fading more and more eachday.

My weekend with my mom turned out great. We had an awesome time. That woman means the world to me.

This weekend I'm heading to see my ex (Rob) it was his b-day last week and we're supposed to get together and catch up - whether this will happen or not is to be seen since he's known for his last minute change of plans. I think his gf is unimpressed with me. Just a comment he made when I called him on his b-day and she was there....I don't think she likes me.

And yesterday I finally told Paul that I was seeing someone. I wouldn't say I was avoiding him exactly....but yah I pretty much was. I had been in training so emailing wasn't really a luxury. But I was giving it time to cool off so when I did tell him it didn't seem like I had been lying all along. He hasn't emailed me back so I think he might be pretty upset which is the last thing I wanted to do but....I couldn't keep giving him false hope. Oy vey men problems are so draining.

I need to get some sleep for tomorrow....Keith is meeting my parents - eek! Wish me luck....and lots of it!

2:18 p.m. - 2003-06-18

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