curious-me's Diaryland Diary

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Decisions...

To count points or to not count points this is the dilemma.

I'm torn right now. One part of me wants to start counting points and doing the 'weight watcher' thing (on my own not through them) and the other just wants to try the 'eat healthy and exercise' route. I've done the WW thing and it's worked. But shouldn't the eating healthy and exercising work if I'm dedicated enough?

I don't know. Part of me knows that without discipline ie writing things down then I donít feel in control of the situation. I also, regardless, of how I do this have to make up an exercise schedule. This week has not been a good one. I feel we're treating the gym to randomly. There's too many 'maybe's and if's'. I need something more tangible. I have 5 months till my wedding gown comes in. I don't want to waste these months trying to get my butt in gear. I'm trying to put this into perspective and telling myself that this week is a 'test' week. Next week, or more importantly February 1 is when it starts 'for real'. I want to not only have a plan for eating and exercising in place but I actually want to start incorporating it.

Poor Keith. I don't think he knows how gung ho I am to do this. How I not only want to do it but need to do it. I don't want to look at my wedding photo's someday and think 'if only I had actually tried to get in shape!". I don't want any 'if only's".

This is what Keith said to me the other day, "you're the most casual stressed out person I know". I told a co-worker that and they laughed because I never look stressed or act it. Outwardly I'm calm and I laugh a lot but inside I'm a pile of nerves. I don't see the point in walking around acting all stressed out. I know I shouldn't internalize it so much cause that can't be healthy either. But I thought that that sentence correctly sums me up.

I did end up dying my hair the other night. It, as I predicted, came out looking the same minus the grey. Ah well.

Next Wednesday T and I are going over to C's for dinner. It's C's birthday. She doesn't want a fuss. T and I are going to send flowers to her work. She'll kill us but I don't care.

Well it's just about time to go. Now I have to decide which gym I want to go to. I emailed Keith on the off chance he was off by now to let him know that I drove to work so I'll be heading directly to the gym. I have baking to do tonight for a Tsunami bake sale we're having at work. The women's gym would be easiest to go to and would be less busy but I find myself hating the equipment and that turns me off big time. The only alternative would be too risk it and go to the Super Gym and try and get a parking spot or go to the Women's Gym in Waterloo which is a lot more travel time. Sigh.

I really wish I was a morning person so I could get the gym out of the way before the day even begins! Where did that morning gene go? My parents are both morning people?! Argh.

I think it's about -30 with the windchill. Those gym clothes are gonna be mighty chilly!

4:47 p.m. - 2005-01-27

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