curious-me's Diaryland Diary


Dizzy or just ditzy?

I just emailed my sil (not the new one) and now Iím all nervous cause sheís yet to respond. You see I basically told her that my niece and nephew werenít going to be in my wedding. Itís not because I donít want them. I just know that she is expecting her 3rd child any day now and I know itís going to be an insane time for her and my brother. But I donít want the children to feel slighted or hurt that their aunt doesnít want them in her wedding. So I asked her what she thought about it all. Iím really hoping I didnít come across the wrong way. I know I shouldnít do this via email but I suck face to face or over the phone. I tend to babble on and on and then I definitely say the wrong things. Iím on pins and needles waiting for her reply!

So I scared myself this morning. Keith awoke me at 7 (half an hour before my alarm) and we just lazed in bed until my bladder screamed at me to get up and go. When I got up I was dizzy. Dizzy as in I couldnít stand up straight without leaning to one side and then having to grab the wall. It was very unnerving. Eventually it calmed down and I had a shower but I still felt off kilter. I then ate the breakfast Keith made for me and then had to fight the nausea that kept coming over me. It was very strange and a little disconcerting to say the least.

So this morning one of the first things I did when I came into work was googled my dizziness. I stumbled across this paragraph in one of the links I followed:

ďThe majority of persons with vague dizziness they can ill describe have an anxiety equivalent. They are just nervous. This may seem ridiculous at first glance but a number of good studies have shown this to be true and laboratory tests are almost always negative. When a vague nondescript headache accompanies dizziness this is nearly always indicates anxiety. Dizziness, especially vertigo, can sometimes also occur as part of a migraine headache syndrome.Ē

I have had a stupid nagging headache for the last several days. Not enough to take some pills (except for Saturday the day from mini-hell). But yah, anxiety. Iím kind of hoping itís not true but I guess it would be better than something being physically wrong with me. I guess I gotta chill more. I always have something on my mind and more than not I have many things on my mind concerning my current banking situation (still no funds!), moving and planning a wedding. Everyone told me in the beginning to enjoy the whole process of planning a wedding but really how can you do that? Thereís always so many details to contend with. Guess I gotta do some more yoga or something. Or maybe I should have re-thought this whole moving thing coinciding with this wedding thing! (Oh yah I also remembered this morning that I wrote my rent cheque on my old account which means that cheque is going to bounce. I called the landlord to find out if she had already cashed the cheque but havenít heard back yet). Gah!

Last night T and I went and looked at flowers. An hour later than I told the lady. I mean we didnít make an official appointment. She had said between 7 and 9 would be the best so I told her I would try for 7. I say this because the lady gave me attitude in the beginning when we showed up at 8. T and I had been swimming at her place and it had been hard to leave the pool. Itís not even like we went to a flower shop we went to a grocery store that has a flower shop in it. Anywho the lady chilled out and was quite helpful. T was the most helpful though. She knows flowers. I barely know a daisy from a rose. Seriously. I just like to look at pretty things not know all about them.

But we picked out all the flowers for the wedding and I am $400 poorer. Weddings arenít cheap. Iím hoping the bouquets turn out okay. I went with all fall colors so my fingers are crossed. Release and let go Ė it is out of my hands. Deep breath.

This Saturday my mom and I have an appointment at the dress shop so I can try on my wedding dress for the first time ever. Itís for 10:15. On my answering machine I thought my mom said 6:15 a.m. That would not have been cool. Yah so Iím super nervous about that Ė welcome back dizziness!

12:52 p.m. - 2005-08-03


previous - next

latest entry

about me





random entry

other diaries: