curious-me's Diaryland Diary

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Rambles of a rambler

A staple of my wardrobe is black. It’s just easier to deal with when getting dressed – especially black pants. I normally always wear black on Monday’s – top and pants – and I make a joke that I am ‘mourning the end of the weekend’. I’m sluggish enough in the mornings. This week I have avoided black. I had even laid out my clothes Sunday night – black pants and a black sweater with a slight pattern. It’s still hanging off my wardrobe waiting to be worn. In some perverse way I cannot bring myself to wear black knowing I will be wearing it soon enough at my uncle’s funeral.

I found out that Keith slept like crap Sunday night. Unlike me he did not drug himself. He said he awoke about 3am, used the washroom and then had trouble sleeping. I asked him why? He looked at me like I was half crazy, he said, “I knew your uncle too”. I can be dumb sometimes. Of course the death affects so many people. I thought about not ‘drugging’ myself last night but knew that my mind will not stop thinking about ev-er-y-th-ing and sure enough when I woke up at 6:30 with my alarm it was like “BAM” my mind began to spin with thoughts and questions and concerns. I know I won’t rest easy until my parents are back in the country and till I talk to my mom. I cancelled swimming with T tomorrow night as my parents will be arriving home around 6pm and I know they will be busy with phone calls but I hope to be one of those phone calls. Well I plan on talking to them either way – that’s just how it is.

Weekend plans are of course up in the air. I printed out my packing list that I keep on the computer (it is formatted and only the ‘essentials’ ie pills etc are on it. I can’t write anything else on it cause I don’t know if I’m packing for a weekend away for a) a funeral or b) spend time with my K-peeps celebrating a birthday. I’m not complaining, I’m just sayin’.

How can vitamins be such a pain in the ass to take? I’m taking a multi vitamin for ‘women’. It’s got a bit extra iron and I guess other junk that us women need but the bottle says to take it with food and to take a few hours before and after other medications. Um, I take mymedications with my food! Argh. It’s only my second day taking them but so far I’m really just taking them between meals when I am feeling full and not with any food. I think you are just supposed to not take them on an empty stomach as I’m sure it could annoy the stomach lining.

I finally ate my home packed lunch today. It’s been over a week. Poor Keith. Last week I was sick and the 2 days I was here I didn’t feel like the salad he made me (who eats salad when sick?) and yesterday a co-worker took me out for lunch to get me out of the office and my mind off things.

Today I still wasn’t up for walking at lunch, I know I should but I just can’t. I’m hoping tomorrow. The weather will be a lot nicer and I’ll need the distraction since my parents will be coming home that night so I’m sure my head will just be in the clouds and worried about them till I hear from them. So, I went for a short walk to the local stores in hopes to a) find a b-day gift for my sil or b) find a cute st patty’s day shirt for Mr D cause I think it would be hysterical/cute to see him in a green shirt with his red hair! Of course I found neither! I was looking at clothes cause this store sometimes has great quality clothes from high end stores that for some reason end up here. But then I realized my sil is preggers and der probably not a good idea to buy her clothes! Of course I did find a cute sweater/coat for myself. It is so nice and it was regularly $75, then $25 now on clearance for $20. The hell I went through buying that coat! I shouldn’t be spending money. I know this. We are….trying to keep afloat and cut back on everything and I just….didn’t care. I mean I do care but my head right now is not caring so much. I still have the receipt so there’s a chance I will take it back (no really…I mean it….sort of). Sigh. I did buy my sil 2 b-day cards. Yah 2. One is from me all sentimental and shit the other is a funny one from both Keith and I. I still don’t know what to get the girl though! She pretty much gets whatever she needs or wants when it arises. So far I got her a nice bag that is decorated to her musical sensibilities, and a box of flaky’s. Yah. I would buy her a cute top or what have you but I am bringing her a top that I got from a friend of a friend that is used but still cute and would look cute on a pregnant woman. I almost bought a pair of yellow jogger type pants. For myself. They were only $5. Sanity returned and I put them back. I thought they might be nice for Spring. Step away from the yellow.

Well I've seemed to have rambled on enough. I wrote the above at work, through out the day - sometimes my mind starts to wander (a lot this week) so I just have to start typing.

8:36 p.m. - 2012-03-06

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