curious-me's Diaryland Diary

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A Christmas to forget.

Here it is Friday of Christmas week and I am sitting at work….and I never thought I would say this but I am happy to be here. I was pretty certain, at one point, that I would be calling in absent for today. I am thankful I didn’t have to.

The backstory. I got off work at noon on Tuesday and Keith had the car packed and ready to go and by 12:30 we were on the road to my parents. The traffic was light and the weather was great. We made it ahead of schedule. My mom and dad were both home. Mom was preparing food for Christmas dinner the next day. The evening rushed by as my dad had 2 church services to do because both churches are stubborn asses and work my dad to death because they won’t combine services and just have one f*cking service. Yah it does seem wrong to swear when talking about churches but man both congregations piss me off and when it involves making my dad work so hard I get resentful. Anyway. After both services we headed back to my parents – it was around 9:30. My younger brother and his family came for just half an hour – long enough to get their little ones into pj’s for the car ride home. Then it was just me and Keith, my parents and my mom’s cousin and we watched it’s a Wonderful Life. At midnight we all went to bed. I slept pretty good as I had my ear plugs in and since Keith was sick they barely did the job at one point with his loud snoring beside me.

At 8am I woke up but all was quiet upstairs. I got up and Keith woke up too so we both went upstairs – all was still quiet. A few minutes later my dad came down the hallway and I sprang into action saying Merry Christmas but the look on his face stopped me. He told me my mom was on the phone with telehealth and he was probably going to be taking her to the hospital. She had been up all night with horrible abdominal pains and at one point he wanted to call an ambulance but she wanted to push through it in hopes it would pass. Several minutes later my mom came out of the bedroom, pale and barely able to walk. My dad put her in the car. I asked if he wanted us to go or stay – he said stay – so I told him to take his cell phone (my parents rarely use it). After he left I burst into tears.

Okay a bit of back – back – story. A few weeks ago there was an incident at my younger brother’s house involving my mom. I can’t – won’t get into it. But it was disconcerting and my sil and I decided to keep an eye on my mom. So this event worried me probably more than it should. And just a brief history about my mom – she has had 2 heart attacks so I will forever be worried about this lady for the rest of my life.

I gave it about 20 minutes before I called my uncle to tell him as my dad was taking my mom to a hospital in their town and I knew he would go down and be with my dad. He didn’t disappoint. But he did scare the shit out of me by telling me “not to worry BUT…” then he went on to say how a lot of heart conditions masquerade themselves as stomach issues etc. I got off the phone and called my older brother and younger brother and both times I burst into tears!!! I felt like crap for doing it and wish I was better in a crisis. But I was scared for my mom and was thinking the worst after my talk with my uncle. I told both my brother’s it wasn’t as bad as I was making it – I was just emotional and worried. Then I got off the phone and proceeded to sit for the next 3 hours worried about my mom. My dad called a couple times with no real updates. They put my mom on IV. They gave her a sedative. My dad then gave me instructions about taking all the food to the church where our luncheon was going to be, I questioned him but he said mom wouldn’t want it not to happen after all the preparation and there were supposed to be 25 people. Keith and I followed the instructions – met my aunt and her daughter at the church and began to get ready. My aunt and cousin stayed in the kitchen while Keith and I set up the tables and chairs and the other 101 jobs. My dad called off and on and then around 1:30 he came to the church and at 2:30 got a call saying they were releasing my mom. He was happy but I think he thought she was okay. They really just needed the room and there was no more to do for her as any tests they wanted to run couldn’t happen as the staff was off – yah nice knowing our medical system really works when we need it to! The rest of us knew she wasn’t ‘better’ she was just well enough for them to kick her out. My dad went to pick her up with thoughts of bringing her to dinner. He soon found out that wasn’t going to happen. My mom was super tired from the sedatives they had given her and could barely get off the stretcher let alone walk. But my dad got her home and into bed.

I pretty much was a zombie most of the day. Worried about my mom. Everyone was worried. The Christmas dinner was definitely not one of celebration – it was more just all of us getting through it. But we pulled together and did it. We finished dinner, the dishes gone done, the tables and chairs got put away, we exchanged gifts and we left around 7. Back home mom was still sleeping. At 10 I felt like I had been up for 24 hours myself so Keith and I went to bed. Poor Keith had a crappy cold this whole time and felt like crap himself.

Boxing Day I got up around 8 again to a quiet house. This time my dad met me and said my mom slept all night and was feeling slightly better. Still in a bit of pain and super tired but she was doing okay. She managed to get up and come out to the living room where the 4 of us opened our presents and she managed to have a cup of tea before returning to bed. Keith and I showered and packed up the car. I woke my mom at noon as I kissed her goodbye. She was still super sleepy but said she was feeling a bit better.

And that was my crappy Christmas. It really hit home just how much Christmas isn’t about the presents and the trappings of it all but about Family. That’s all any of us cared about. We just wanted to know our mom was okay. I apologized to both my brothers for crying on the phone and they both told me they understood.

I’m not going to lie I am still worried about my mom. My dad and her are leaving for NS today to spend New Years with their best friends. They were supposed to leave yesterday but my dad promised he would stop and do a funeral in Quebec on their way through – only my dad. And if that isn’t bad enough the funeral isn’t until 4:30 in the afternoon – dad asked them to a) change the day to Friday or push the time up on Saturday. They said no. And here I go getting pissed off again. They pretty much guilted my dad into doing this funeral and he is going out of his way to do it and they can’t even move up the effin time. People are so god damn self absorbed it kills me. I really wish he would say "no" more. He’s not a young man. He can’t always push his own needs aside. Or my mom’s. I just hope my mom is up for this trip. If she is feeling better it will do them the world of good to get away (barring stopping for any more funerals) because they do WAY too much at home. They are both on too many committee’s and they both push themselves beyond what anyone their age should be doing. Hell I get tired just when they tell me about what they are doing! They need to Slow Down.

And now...I am going to slow down. My work day went slowly but at least it is done and I am looking forward to the weekend. Tomorrow is Christmas on Keith's side of the family. Keith's cold seems to have gotten worse today and my throat is now feeling 'off'. Is 2013 over yet?!

7:13 p.m. - 2013-12-27

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