curious-me's Diaryland Diary


I'm normal....really

Good news. The hunger period is over. You see once a month for a period of time I want to live in an all you can eat buffet. It seems I can't get enough food. Usually I get it about a week or so before my aunt comes to visit. Too much info? I couldn't eat all my lunch today. Good times.

So my weekend was very uneventful. Friday we left early and headed to the boss'. We managed to get a bit turned around (we were trying to avoid construction). But all 5 of us made it. I didn't drive, I caught a ride with one of my co-workers. Being the smart girl that I am I decided to drop my car off at Keith's (along with the keys) so he could use it if he was so inclined. I drove over to his place and there was not a place to be found - not even an illegal one! There apparently was a funeral at the church down the road from him (I gather from the hearse out front and the many people in dark suits). I drove around in vain for a bit and finally had to admit defeat. I booted it back to my work (my co-worker was supposed to pick me up at Keith's). I caught them just as they were leaving - whew. Except I never got a chance to email Keith that I didn't park the car out front of his house - oops.

The party was pretty low key (I mean c'mon its work people we're hanging out with). We ate, we played a guess the baby in the picture game (I didn't win!). Then my friend T stopped by and there were 3 of us leaving with her and the party just seemed to disintegrate all at once. My wraps went over well so I was happy. Once we left we went to a bar and had a drink. One. Then we moved on to my other co-worker's place. We sat around her place for a few hours drinking and talking (bitching) about work. It was pretty fun. My guy missed me.

I was in bed by 12:30 and up at 10 the next morning. Ah sleep. I got a call from my mom just to chit chat. She mentioned that my gram was still in the hospital (she had hip surgery about a week ago) she now has pneumonia so she'll be in longer. After lazing around for a while longer I finally got up and threw on some clothes and went for a walk. After my 40 minute walk I ended up at a park and sat in the sun and read some, listened to some music and just thought about life. I walked away feeling uplifted. That felt good. But in the back of my mind I was starting to worry about my gram. Once back at home after Keith was up just as he was about to leave to go pick up some groceries for dinner, I started to cry. I was trying to wait till he left to cry cause I felt kind of dumb crying over nothing (just worry). But I burst like a dam and he was good about it. Then I started to think that I should go visit her. Keith agreed with me. So I decided to go on Sunday to visit her in Oshawa.

Saturday night I slept like crap. I kept having bad dreams involving my family. Then near the wee hours of the morning I started to get mad at Keith (I didn't tell him this) but I was upset that he wasn't coming with me. It's never fun to go a hospital to visit a loved one - especially alone. I didn't want to face that. After I got up I thought about it some more and decided not to go. I felt a little drained from the bad night of sleep and also I didn't want to go and visit my gram and take one look at her and start to cry. I'm thinking that if she's still in the hospital next weekend maybe I'll talk Keith into holding my hand and coming to visit with me. I've visited too many close family members in the hospital to do this alone. It brings back bad memories. 2 heart attacks and 1 cancer to be exact.

The rest of Sunday I didn't do much. I finally left the apartment in the evening to buy the makings for ceasar salad which I had a craving for. Uneventful.

I felt bad since I could have spent a lot of my time cleaning my apartment. I just couldn't get motivated. At all. Very depressing. But today I did take a step in the right direction and bought a couple of large tuperware type containers to store some of my loose papers etc in. It's a start. That's what I tell myself.

I also bought myself another water bottle. I left my Darien Lake one in T's truck. I'm a freak cause I just can't drink water out of any ol' bottle. I'm picky about it. If the bottle appeals to me I'll drink the water. I never claimed to be normal folks!

4:30 p.m. - 2004-08-23


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