curious-me's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Waiting for those endorphins to kick in... It's 9:45 and I just got back from the gym. Before you begin to jump up and down and start clapping for me I must confess that what I did at the gym could hardly constitute as a workout. It's all I could do to force myself to go to the gym - I'm surprised when I had to run out to the car to get my sports bra that I didn't just leave for good - I seriously considered it. I am feeling so....ugh these days. Internally I feel so psychotic. I just want to cry one minute and throw shit and punch stuff the next. I HATE this feeling. Luckily I don't get pms this bad every month - I couldn't handle it if I did. I don't even like myself when I feel like this so I don't know how Keith stands me. Last night we were so bitchy towards eachother. Him because he was tired, me because I was just being a bitch - not on purposed but because the bitch inside me kept coming out. He was probably relieved when it was bedtime just to get away from me. I was relieved too - not to get away from him but to get away from myself. Did I mention I HATE when I feel like this? I just feel so mental inside. It really doesn't help that my back is still killing me and I should stop being a wuss and just make the damn chiro appointment. It's not even like I truely pay for it - I have benefits! Last night I could not fall asleep, my shoulders were killing me and then the pain started to radiate down my arms which is freaking me out. I ended up taking 2 muscle relaxers and had Keith massage my neck for a few minutes (I had apologized for being a mega-bitch by that point). Work has been okay considering how short staffed we are. The days zoom by and so far I haven't been mega stressed - which is a good thing considering how volatile I am feeling this week! I could seriously see someone getting bitch slapped if they pissed me off this week! We have to have our vacation requests in for the summer by April 1 - a Saturday. Um yah. My boss told me this afternoon that people have already submitted - wtf?! I've had mine done and sitting in my drafts folder cause I didn't know we could do that. I am so going to freak if I don't get approved. I took the day before and day after the May 24 long weekend and a week in August. I figure the May 24 is probably the trickiest. But I'll be in Orillia on Thursday eve watching Michael Bolton perform (woo!) and driving home that night is just not gonna happen. We also want to go camping the rest of that weekend and then the Tuesday is Keith's b-day and we'll both have it off if approved. I HATE waiting! I've worked too goddamn hard these past few months and put up with a lot of shit. If my vacation gets denied I seriously think I may lose it. Hmmm there's a thought? Go off on stress leave! Well I better end this entry now cause I can't seem to stop venting. Oh but wait - one more vent! I went to Sears tonight cause they're having that pant sale that the hubby and I were at a few days ago. I thought 'hey I need pants - when don't I? I keep outgrowing mine!'. I spent one and a half hours there and nothing. I tried on black pants, blue pants, brown pants, grey pants! Nothin'. Of course I then found a pair of khaki green capris and fell in love with them - regular price not on sale! I spent eons debating it. They're a size that I would hate to say outloud and may even rip the tag out of! But first I have to go to Sears again on the weekend. Why you ask? Well as it turns out they're having a suprise 2 day sale and I"m checking to see if these puppies are on sale! You can bet your sweet ass if they are I am returning mine and then rebuying them! Why wouldn't I just wait you ask? Well good question. But as it turns out it seems the exorbirant size I bought was the only pair in that size! I couldn't risk it cause when I take risks I seem to lose. Wow I'm just a glass half empty girl today aren't I? Did I mention I feel mental? Just checking. I'm outta here. 9:48 p.m. - 2006-03-29 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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