curious-me's Diaryland Diary


Yes, it is you.

Yes, dear diary I have been avoiding you. Why? Because I don't want to talk about what's currently going on in my life that's why. But guess what? That hasn't made it any better, just cause I don't talk about it here doesn't mean it's not happening. So let's just record the craziness for prosperity's sake shall we?

Oh first I must mention that when our receptionist came back she confided in me that she did have H1-N1 - it was never actually confirmed cause her doctor told her not to come in and see him but he said that all signs pointed to YES you have it. Nice. My manager was standing right beside me as the receptionist was talking about it - I couldn't help but find that terribly funny.

Anywho, I woke up Monday morning all befuddled and just overall 'meh'. I could not get my head in the game. I decided that waiting till the end of the week to talk to my doctor was a stupid idea so I called and booked an appointment for Tuesday. I must admit, say what I will about my doctor but he can almost always get me in within a day or two.

Tuesday I was a bundle of nerves. I went to my appointment and was left alone in the room to wait for my doctor. My file was up on the screen, hells ya I had to look. It was what I expected and it made my heart sink to read it. It's my blood sugar. It's high. I still hate hate hate saying the word - Diabetes. My doctor was a bit harsh with me at first as his way but he softened and tried to give me tips and whatnot. He again was going to refer me to a nutritionist (he did that several months ago but it went nowhere). I left there with a prescription for a low dose pill. I got it filled as the pharmacy connected to the office. The pharmacist was this awesome guy in his 40's I guess who asked me a few questions about the pill and once he realized this was all new to me he was simply amazing. He even took me into his office and showed me how to use one of those glucose machines so I can take my own readings at home and monitor my blood sugar (thankfully it's all covered in my health care plan - I'm technically supposed to get the referral from my doctor but he said they'd just do it backwards.) The pharmacist had apparently worked at a diabetic clinic and was full of all sorts of information and tips. When I had been first getting my perscription filled it had been all I could do to hold my tears back - I just wanted to wait till I at least was alone in my car. But after the loooong talk with the pharmacist I walked out of there with a smidgen of hope.

Since then (only yesterday!) it's been a seesaw of emotions. Obviously sadness that it's come to this. Pissed off because 'why me' and why does everyone in my damn family seem to have diabetes??? Acceptance comes and goes but it is early. Keith has been totally awesome (well except for his intial text after I told him and he said he was going to have to replace me with a healthier wife!). We've both been reading all sorts of info about it but he's been doing the shopping and getting me on the right track. We had fish for dinner - I think it's the first time we've had that EVER since we've been together - real fish that is - not baked in the oven or deep fried. I love fish but him - not so much. He's doing it for me. Although we have a ton of halloween crap sitting around the house and it is taunting me like you would not believe. Ahem.

So I took my first pill last night with my dinner and felt nauseous afterwards (a side affect that the pharmacist said was common but he also warned me NOT to give up and just let me body adjust to it). Combine that with my new blood pressure pill I'm taking - it leaves me slightly light headed sometimes. But that may not be the cause as I have to take into consideration that I am getting my period this week (oh yes the meds last night also SPED that up!) PLUS I am coming down with a cold. My throat is freakin' sore and my head is all achey. If I don't wake up with a full on head cold I will be shocked. Part of me wants the damn cold just to come and not prolong as I can call in sick tomorrow and I am legitimitely off Friday - I can be sick tomorrow and still enjoy my legit day off! We'll see.

So that's been my fun few days. I have all these different things happening to my body and I have no idea what's causing it! I have too much going on. I totally skipped the gym today as I figure if I'm feeling rotten and run down it's a bad idea to go push myself at the gym. R&R for this girl. Keith should be heading to bed soon so I'm hoping to pop in a girly movie and watch that and NOT think about the sweet and salty snackfood I can no longer have. Sigh.

6:46 p.m. - 2009-11-04


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