curious-me's Diaryland Diary


Crunching along the path to happiness

So maybe when I win the lottery I think I will get a part time job. I could volunteer I suppose. Whatev, as long as it gets me out of the house, I should be good. I am learning that I am a person who needs structure in my life. If I have too much time - ie the whole day - then I tend to....waste it for lack of a better word. I won't putt around inside, rather I will stumble to my basement and spend the day schlepping on the laptop and in front of the boob tube. Sometimes I can be arsed in to doing other things but it's a rare day that I get a lot accomplished. All this is meant to say that I regret not moving from my couch yesterday. No...wait I did move...from the the bed...back to the couch. I did have a rip roaring headache yesterday so I'm sure that didn't help my productivity. I also have a husband who loves our basement and hates sunlight (for the most part). Since he works in sunshine pretty much all day when he's off he loves to burrow in our basement and avoid daylight altogether. If I want to spend time with him I follow suit and let me not kid you here, once my butt finds it's groove in the couch I am not complaining about the lack of activity.

Thank goodness Saturday was productive or I would be one sad chickita. Sometimes you feel like life is passing you by...and sitting on your butt while it zooms on by doesn't help matters.

I'm also feeling a bit disappointed in myself. Ever since my doctor's May? I can't remember now, I've been on this self sabatoge kick. I know he weighed me and I know he's going to do it again when I go back in September but rather than use this is as motivation I....give up. I dropped exercising (and of course had a million excuses that all made sense at the time) and started eating crappier than ever. I can't remember the last time I had a salad. I have no idea why I'm rebelling and quite honestly I won't let myself dwell on it. I won't think about it, I refuse to. I sometimes wonder what the meds I'm taking are doing to my body, but will I google it or look into what I am putting in my body? Nope.

I did bring my walking clothes this morning - since I had extra time to get ready - so if it doesn't rain I plan on walking at lunch. The rain is a legit excuse BUT it shouldn't stop me from exercising at home after work. I'm not sure what else I can do to give myself a wake up call. I'm popping pills, testing my blood, seeing my doctor every couple months - if that's not a wake up call I don't know what is.

Oh yah the reason I had extra time this morning was that I called in and told my manager I would be late cause I had to go pick up some meds at the pharmacy at 8am. This was the truth. Last night as I went to pop the ol' birth control pill I couldn't find the new pack. I looked everywhere but then figured I must have used the last pack so I ran to the pharmacy and tried to get another pack - it turns out that I should have an extra month and they couldn't release a new pack as my plan wouldn't pay for it. So I went back home, looked around a little (Keith was sleeping) and then decided to look more in the morning. I got up with my alarm this morning (yuck) and looked around for almost half an hour and still couldn't find them. I finally decided to just go to the pharmacy and pay the $30 for my sanity. If I find the pack - bonus, if not - lesson learned! (Yah I wish)

On Saturday I headed out pretty early - I'm on a mission to find a large picture frame - I am finally getting around to printing off my wedding pics - not all but about 150 of them. I plan on making a photo collage and hanging it in our bedroom. It's really the only bare wall available and plus we need something in our room. I bought a new bed spread that is quite colorful. Our room is brown. Brown walls, brown curtains, brown furniture. It is dull. We're too cheap and lazy to paint so I figure hanging pics (or in this case photos) combined with a new bed spread will brighten up the room. I also have plans for our spare room. I really want to buy a futon for the room but I don't think Keith is too keen on it. I figure I will do some research and find out prices etc and then go to him with my 'idea'.


Well all that was written this morning. I didn't get a chance to go for a walk at lunch. It had rained heavily all morning and at lunch it was still crappy out. Also I was having an email marathon with S. We were making plans for the coming weekend although as it turned out we were making plans for different weekends. I was talking about this coming one and she was talking about a week from now. D'oh. We did eventually get on the same page and it turns out we will be getting together and having a girls weekend so yay for that!

Tonight I threw in a load of laundry and then sat back down on the couch and picked up the laptop. I had cleaned non-stop since getting home from work (in prep for S's visit). It was 8:30 so it was too late to go for a walk. Wait...what? It was ONLY 8:30 and still light out! So I forced myself to go get changed into walking clothes and head out for a walk. I am SO glad I did that. It's so rejuvenating! I even walked up a steep hill - twice! My ipod died halfway through but that turned out to be for the best. I took out my earbuds and just listened to nature - the birds chirping and the animals (a lot of bunnies) rustling in the grass. Not to mention the gravel crunching under my feet - I Love the sound of crunching gravel. I was going to throw in a second load of laundry but I decided not to - I would rather go to bed at a decent hour cause I am one tired grrl. Mkay time to post and go rest this weary head!

9:45 p.m. - 2010-07-12


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